Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Day 179, June 28

My accumulated years should impart some wisdom to me. Unfortunately, any wisdom I might have gleaned from life's experiences seems to have made little impression upon me for I continue to make the same mistakes over and over.

Unlike the toddler who is learning to walk and soon learns what works and what doesn't, I can't seem to get it through my head of what works and what doesn't in life. I have always had a sharp memory (until recently) that stood me in good stead for remembering dates, facts, and other bits of trivia. My memory, though, fails me in cognizing the important things.

Scripture and the prophets tell me that forgiving those who have wronged me (or my family) is essential, but I hold onto grudges as though they were a life vest. Grudges provide important functions. They comfort me when I am lonely. They bolster my self-righteousness. They give credence to my bias toward certain people.

Grudges also keep me from progressing, both in this life and in the hereafter. They keep me from giving time and energy to those I love. They keep me from loving more fully.

So, for today, I am grateful not for grudges, but for reminders to let them go.

1 comment:

  1. Too funny! Yes, grudges are the life vests that keep me afloat on the sea of self-pity. My sea is vast and well-explored, I assure you.